So, no use in sugar coating this. My relationship with Jesus has been...sucky. not intentionally, of course...I just get b.u.s.y. Even now, its 11:15pm...I need to go to bed, but at some point, things just need to change. There is some balance of giving yourself a break, because let's face it, life is crazy, and needing to make different choices - tough choices - that something will have to be sacrificed. Time with my girls? Time spent sleeping? Time with my husband? Work? Time relaxing? (wait -- I DESREVE to relax every once in awhile!) aaagghhhh! Oh, Jesus, how selfish I must seem to you! and how grateful I am for your unending grace for me. We were discussing in Sunday school this morning Matthew 20:20. The general conversation was that our prayers become ineffective when they are spoken selfishly. How guilty I am of this so very often; much too often. And then have the audacity to be mad at God for not answering. Y.E.P. it's ugly, and it's true. So, all of this to say...in an effort to recapture the magic in my relationship with Jesus I have agreed to jump on the memorizing Colossians bandwagon. I found jealousy rising up in my heart when Dr. G spoke about his experience with memorizing entire books of the Bible. How I wish I could speak of the closeness he seems to feel with Jesus; how I long to know His words deep in my soul; to see His word come alive.
I serve a faithful God. I serve a selfless God. I serve a generous God.
Come on Jesus, let's light this fire again.